“Mama we’re getting married!” This was the beginning of a wonderful and thrilling chapter that would transform Carrie Ann’s life into a whole new wondrous way of looking at the world. White on White, Lace on Satin was a song her mother would sing to her when she was a little girl. She knew that someday her “TRUE LOVE” would come.
Steven was the cousin of Laurie’s husband and Carrie was Laurie’s best friend and her maid-of-honor. This unlikely set of coincidences led to the Union of two people, living several hundred miles apart. Six children later, happiness still abounds.
“. . . I love the flowers, I love the daffodils. I love the firelight when the light is low. . . That’s what we were singing when all of the sudden there was this HUGE ruckus in the next canyon over. Don’t know what was going on. You know, some of their friends were visiting us at the time. The Indians seemed to be real friendly and cordial. Well they jumped up, raised their tomahawks, and ran chanting weird songs. All of the sudden, we heard shouting and screaming. We were scared out of our wits! It was scary.”
“It’s about time we got some respect – We are a peace loving people! Forget what you’ve read in those cheap nickel readers. YOU HEAR ME? Sorry, I didn’t mean to raise my voice. We do tend to sit around a bonfire and drink White Lightening on holidays. We deserve it, you know. It’s hard being portrayed as . . . Wait a minute . . . . LITTLE MAN has brought me distressing news. I shall have to cut this documentary in half. I must attend to an onslaught of . . . unwelcome soldiers. I suggest you RUN NOW!“
The group decided to relocate to a country that gives away free medical service, free education, free food, free clothing, free housing and the best of all, free money! All they had to do is get there! Sounds good doesn’t it? Everyone agreed and pointed the way North. “It’ll work, it always has!” the Leader said. The Man with the bolt cutters laughed and showed the Leader what he had brought for the trip! “Ha, ha, ha” laughed the Leader. “This is just too easy; they won’t know what to do! It will be fun.” he mused! “Fun, Fun, Fun!
Living on the 35th floor of a high rise didn’t make it easy to get in touch with Nature or men. Bored, Tonya decided to improve her dull Brick patio by going to “Tom’s Green Thumb” store. She grabbed a cart and searched the aisle marked EASY CARE PLANTS. After ten minutes, she was frustrated.
A really cute guy came to help her.
“I’m Thomas Thumb. May I help you . . . Miss? “
“Carter,” while pinching herself she added “Yes.”
“Didn’t you sit behind me in Botany 101 class first year at State?”
That simple question turned into a family of four.
If the Contessa hadn’t been on this extreme diet, he wouldn’t be digging up the back yard. “Lose 10 pounds Overnight” was the catchy slogan for the radical new weight loss program sweeping the Land of Goshen.
“Hey Contessa, how many rings did you lose?” Rusty, the crochety yard man screamed. He had a vile temper.
She, being the epitome of refinement and culture, constantly had blue birds singing while encircling her head. The lovely Contessa sang him an answer: “Due to the rapid weight lose, all five of my gold rings slipped off my fingers while on the throne.”
“My rain galoshes may look older than Methuselah, but they caught your dad!” Laurie told her children, Rachel, Sarah and Trevor. They were mesmerized.
Mama squeaked trying to hold her breath while changing Trevor’s loaded diaper. Sarah fidgeted to keep from laughing. They knew their mother had grown up poor but didn’t know what poor looked like. Mama could see that realism was sinking in. “These boots helped catch your father.” Mama went on “While running to the store, it started to rain and my feet got soaked. In my path was Daddy, fixing his old bicycle with duct tape.”