Archive | April 2015

The Secret of the Harbor

The Secret of the HarborBy, Nan Claire Falkner

Chris was catching up. If only she could reach the Harbor. Holding onto the map for dear life, she made it and looked back smiling as he knocked over a street vendor. Quickly she took her jacket off turning it inside out. She pulled the wig out of her bag, put it on quickly and grabbed a cigarette. Exhaling, she ordered a vodka tonic from the waiter. Tonight she could sleep. Unrolling the map Amy looked at the statue pointing toward the treasure. “I understand!” she laughed.

She felt a warm kiss on her neck. “We’ll work together” he whispered.


SummerBy, Nan Claire Falkner

Five hundred years ago, the world was warmer. There were parades in the summer and the Fourth of July was lit with firecrackers and fireworks in the sky. People wore thin summer clothing. Because of the “Great Polar Event”, the world changed overnight. Planting of crops became vertical gardens inside silos and heated from the inner core of the earth. Outdoor events ceased. People became lackadaisical about the importance of the Earth climate and began having more children, thus the need for more food. The planet is doomed. Our only hope is the Scientists working on the “Great Equator Event.”


Holy SmokesBy, Nan Claire Falkner

Last March, the Kansas City Fire Department answered a two alarm fire near the University. After a wild party, Rodrick fell asleep with a drink in his hand, smoking. The accelerant was tequila. The one good thing that came out of the fire was an insulated, fireproof safe.

When Sara, Rod’s “on again – off again” girlfriend, found the key and opened the safe, there was a life insurance policy on top. She opened it up and read – “Shit,” she said, “He didn’t have to do that – I don’t need money – I need him!”

“Well,” the detective said “That’s motive!”

Firecrackers and Trains Don’t Mix

Fireworks and Trains Don't MixBy, Nan Claire Falkner

On a hot Fourth of July in 1991, four kids in a trans-am drove to a vacant industrial park to set off a thousand firecrackers they had bought in another county. It was fun and loud.

Afterwards, the teenagers loaded up and easing the car across the railroad tracks when Steve suddenly shouted STOP! The driver slammed on his brakes just as a 60 mph freight train coming around the corner hit the car.

The trans-am blew up in pieces, and the kids went spinning off in another direction. The responding firemen couldn’t believe it – “Not a scratch on the kids”.

First Step is a Doozy

The first Step is a DoozyBy, Nan Claire Falkner

When we rented the apartment, we thought it was perfect. We were excited about his offer of $1,000 off the first month’s rent.

The ad read: “Beautiful second story apartment w/remodeled kitchen and bathroom – Two bedrooms, 1 bath – Air conditioned with second exit.” The only thing I thought was queer about the walk-through was his deliberate diversion so we couldn’t look out back. He said: “We’re putting up a new deck – almost finished.”

Just before moving in, we read a newspaper story titled “First Step is a Doozy” about the previous renter in heavy traction in the hospital.